John Axtell (newlife@theofficenet.com)
Wed, 28 Mar 2001 08:36:15 -0800
Melissa,
I believe a good example of a protective environment - boy scouts and
Exploring.
These organizations allow growth commensurate with ability.
John
Melissa Bradford wrote:
> John wrote:
>
> > I believe that people best learn the "realities of life" in a protective
> > environment. I do not see the basic SV model as being a protective
> environment but
> > one in which, as in all democracies, those with the best verbal
> communication
> > skills, usually win out, which has nothing to do with which idea is really
> better.
> > I do not equate basic human rights with respecting our kids, which I do
> not think
> > is a crazy idea. I respect kids - a lot !!! I am just having a problem
> with
> > allowing them to vote on issues that I simply do not respect their
> judgments on.
>
> John,
>
> I think you severely underestimate childrens' ability to make decisions, not
> to mention their ability to know when they don't know enough to make a
> decision. Many school meetings I have watched children and adults of all
> ages participate intelligently in discussions, listen to all sides, and make
> informed decisions. Likewise, I have seen both adults and children, choose
> not to vote, either because they did not feel they knew enough to make an
> informed decision, or because they did not care about the outcome, or
> because they couldn't decide which outcome they preferred. I have also seen
> children, and adults, vote one way, and a few months or a year down the
> road, change their position on an issue because they saw the consequences of
> a decision, and learned that it was not the best idea. I have seen
> children, and adults, make a judgement that I thought was mistaken, based on
> my "more extensive knowledge and experience", only to find out that it was a
> good decision. I've seen children, or adults, bring ideas to SM, and those
> with superior knowledge and experience, adults or children, share that
> knowledge and experience, shed new light on an issue, and influence the
> decision-making process greatly.
>
> Do the best verbal communication skills usually win out even if the idea
> does not have as many merits? It has happened, I suppose, but I definitely
> wouldn't say "usually". Usually there are several ideas that all have
> merits and drawbacks, and there is no clearcut answer of what is best.
> Usually, there is an intense and thorough dialogue, with many valid points
> clearly articulated on all sides. If it does happen that an idea with few
> merits is passed, those that were against the idea have an opportunity to
> rethink their argument, improve their own communication skills, and try
> again. In addition, everyone in the community will see the results of an
> idea that did not have many merits. This is one way children, and adults,
> learn in a Sudbury community.
>
> You believe children should not have the right to make decisions because
> they have "little or no knowledge of the realities of life". If we assume
> for the sake of argument that this is true, (although I disagree, see above)
> how do they gain this knowledge then? You have said, children should learn
> them in a protective environment. I am very puzzled by this statement. How
> does this work? How does a child gain knowledge of the realities of life in
> a protective environment? Do they read about it in a book? Listen to
> lectures about it from their parents? I am also confused by your statement
> that a Sudbury school is not a protective environment. Can you define what
> you mean by a protective environment?
>
> It seems you are suggesting, when a person is on his/her own, making their
> own living, then they can make their own decisions. But how does a child
> become ready for that? The Sudbury model postulates that children should
> begin making those decisions right away, thereby learning about consequences
> to their actions, about taking responsibility for the direction of their
> lives. This way, by the time they are adults, they have already become
> self-reliant individuals. What idea are you putting forward to take the
> place of this one? How do you suggest, in your "protective environment",
> that children learn how to make good decisions, if they don't have any real
> power?
>
> Melissa Bradford, LVS, Joliet, IL
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